Turkey Day in Amsterdam

This weekend we celebrated American Thanksgiving in Amsterdam in style: Cajun blue cheese and mushroom hamburgers at the Hard Rock Café. Deeeeeeeelish. There ain’t nothin’ like an American hamburger. No way. Oh, and of course, a minty chocolate martini for me and a mojito for J. Who needs turkey and mashed potatoes when I FINALLY got my American hamburger after one and a half years in Holland?!?!? It didn’t even matter to us that we were thirsty as if walking in the desert for a week for the rest of the day, many thanks to the salty American burger and steak fries (oh, how I love you steak fries with spices). No, no. That didn’t worry us one bit. But we did drink gallons of water at the kitchen store that afternoon, where we spent 5 hours planning our kitchen in the new house. That was awesome. We had so much fun envisioning how pretty it will be., It’s modern with a tiny taste of country. Mostly modern though. It’s so pretty!!!!!

And I didn't have to eat turkey this Thanksgiving, which always makes me happy. Not a turkey fan. Amen to expat Thanksgiving!

I have a problem: I like to stuff food. Meaning, if I can put meat, cheese, mushrooms, Boursin, or pine nuts inside peppers, eggplants, chicken, or anything that looks remotely like a shell and is edible, I want to bake it – after I stuff it, of course. Maybe it’s a winter thing. Maybe I need things to be full or hearty. I don’t know what it is. I like it. So if you’re coming to our house for dinner sometime soon, you’re getting something stuffed and baked. Good? Good. But no turkey. Let's be clear.

J and I were laughing hysterically this weekend. It felt so good to laugh hard. I won’t even bore you with what we thought was get-outta-here-funny. But it was. Yanno when you laugh so hard you have tears rolling down your cheeks? Yep, that’s the one. I love my husband.

I saw a blind guy riding his bicycle the other day. WTF? I am all for people pushing their limits and living outside the lines... but uh... it was a busy street and there were kids and cars all around. Made us all a little confused. We just got the hell out of the way. Maybe that's what he thought we would all do. Huh. For the rest of my walk, I shook my head and laughed. Love the audacity. Go on with yo' bad self, Man.

Christmas is coming so fast this year. Where has this year gone? I’m serious. When I was younger, I always rolled my eyes when an adult would say, “This year has gone so fast – where has the time gone?!!” Whatever. In those days, school couldn’t end fast enough. But I’m getting what they were asking now. Where in the world HAS the time gone this year?!?! It just blew past me, this year. I feel like just yesterday, J and I were beginning to look at wedding venues and talking to the florist… we’ve been married now a little over 3 months and I just can’t believe all that has happened! Life has been very good to us this year. And now we are topping it off with amazing jobs (I just got my dream job!!!), a new house, health, happiness, and love. I don't think we can ask for anything more. Well, maybe world peace. Hey, why not ask?

Too Much Water

So, here I am again. Life is just so crazy! We've been running around like wild chickens for our jobs (i.e. big presentations for both of us and interviews for me), looking for kitchens for the new house (found it, we think!), getting my hair done at a new stylist (Buddha save us all, that is always such an anxiety-ridden joy ride for me - they usually cannot get my hair color... I secretly, okay outright pine for Alfred in Boston... I digress), seeing friends who are traveling into Holland and out, and now, for the love of Allah, I am home sick with the flu. Damnit. I was doing so well this fall. Ah well, let's get over it and move on. But yesterday one of my girls told me the grim reality of people who are dying from it, which of course sent me into a tailspin. So, forget being American and going to work sick. No way. I am hanging on the couch (right - what is my problem with just sitting the F down?!?!?), hanging with Duckie the wonder cat, and watching chick flicks. J is working in Belgium today, so I am hangin', watching the rain blow sideways outside.

I suck on sending wedding thank yous. I do. I know I do. And for some reason, I can find about 25 other things to do every time I think, "Hey, this could be a good time to sit down and write even 5 thank you letters." No, "Why now?" I think. I could be hanging laundry or unloading the dishwasher or going grocery shopping or writing on my blog (read: latest excuse). It's not that hard, for crying out loud. "Dear (insert name), thank you for the lovely wedding gift(s). Love, K&J". But of course, I want to thank each person for the individual gift they gave. And that just makes it complex in my world - even though I have the list of gifts we received and from whom. Yes, that's right,Kristin. Make it harder. Good job. Still, so hard. Suck it up, Kristin. Write your thank yous. Be a decent person, eh? Yes, yes, just after I write on my blog here...

We are supposed to go to Ireland this week for 4 days. Huh. That could be interesting, given that Cork is under water at the moment. Flooded, along with much of the rest of Ireland, England, and Scotland. Not sure what we're going to do yet. We asked the hotel this weekend if we should still come. Their response: "Dear Mr. and Mrs. Q, at the moment we are without drinking water and our sanitary system is not working in full, but of course, you can imagine we will do everything to make sure you have a pleasant stay..." Uuuuum, we appreciate that you will do everything you can - we're okay delaying our trip, b/c yanno, we understand the given horrible circumstances you are all surviving in and also, it's nice to have a running toilet. Buuuuuuuuuuuuut... it's a toss-up. Part of me is like, "Hey, just buy some cheap Wellies and go wade through the streets to the pubs." The good Kristin in me says, "Why not even go volunteer some time this week in Ireland, helping the flood victims, sandbagging (oh, the irony), etc?" Then the high-maintenance, I would like a small vacation where I can relax Kristin says, "Um, no thanks. How about pushing out our reservations and sticking at home for a long weekend?" The clencher is: Tori and Tommy are coming and it would just be so lovely to hang with them for the weekend. Who cares if you're drinking Guinness with water up to your knees in a musty old pub? They smell like they've been flooded for years anyway, right? Right. Haven't quite sold myself on trekking all the way just yet. While it's very reassuring that the hotel also told us, "You can drive from the airport to our hotel," I am just not sure if they mean a car or a boat. TBD.

A Little Blue

I keep accidentally typing “Froever.” I think I like it better than “forever”. I love you froever : I will always love you with an afro. I think that says so much more than just “forever.” With volume, chic and a little pizzazz. Yep, I’m gonna keep it.

Ahhhhh, last week was crap. Our hearts are so heavy with having lost our sweet little LuluBirdy. For a few nights, it's taken me a few hours to finally fall asleep. I was feeling so much guilt over letting Lulu go. I think it all boils down to feeling like we promised Lulu that she could trust us, that we would take care of her, and love her with all our hearts. And then we took her to be put down (after loving her with all our hearts while we have had her). Of course, she was very sick and feeling horrible. The thing that was so hard was looking at her and seeing her beautiful little green eyes looking into our souls, her warm, fuzzy, rabbit fur soft to touch, and her sweet little freckles moving with her whiskers. It felt like she was saying, “I trusted you guys.” But I do think she was truly saying, “Thank you for helping me stop this suffering.” Maybe that’s just me trying to make myself feel better about the horror of letting her go. I have shed so many crocodile tears, my tear ducts are empty, my mind is tired, my heart hurts. I woke this weekend thinking of Lulu when we first got her: she ran up to us and meowed so heartily at the pound, screaming, “Me! Me! Take me! I’m sweet and cute and I promise to love you! I might poke holes in the moldings, the couch, and any plastic sack you accidentally leave out on the counter. But I promise to always love you guys.” :) Oh, and she did. In the early days, when she was feeling healthy, in the morning when we came out into the living room, she would meow “hello!” just once, and so hard that her head would bounce like she was nodding hello as she said it. Ah, such a sweetie pie… I miss you, LuluBird. I miss your sweet little lady-like paws on my lap and all your sweet cuddles.

We were worried about how Duckie might respond, through the night and mornings. He has been such a love bug, purring heavily, looping around our legs and letting us hold him longer than usual. He runs around every night playing with his mice and catnip toys. We play with him with his favorite toy and he jumps over and over again for the bouncy ball on a string. Our little boy is going to be just fine. I think he really grieved Lulu the past few weeks, knowing before we even did that she was sick and suffering. He’s probably relieved that his little sister is peaceful, climbing curtains and chasing spiders in Buddha’s house. It’s such a wonderful dream that gives me peace.

I told J that no matter how much I love the idea of being a farmer, working hard outside and spending my days with animals, I don’t think I could really do it because I would always love my animals so much that it would pain me to see them pass. So I think I will just be a #1 country music fan and visit Aunt Kerry on the farm in Oregon when we can get out there. And I will smile at the cows on my drive to and from work.

It is true that when someone is lost, someone else is brought into this world. This past week, I learned that one of my dear friends had her long-awaited baby girl (congrats S!!!!). I’m not sure if she named her little girl after one of the greatest singers ever to grace us on earth, but Ella is a great name for a great woman. I have high hopes for this little girl. I also learned that my dear Tor is prego again. Yippee! She is SUCH a great mom who I could only wish to be a tenth as good someday. I couldn’t be happier for my girls. They give me hope, inspiration, and peace just when I’ve lost my little fuzzy girl. Life does go on. We all do continue to live our lovely, gift of life. I’m going to do something really special for myself this week. I don’t know what. But I am going to celebrate life. It is meant to be cherished gratefully.